Waxing - The Whys and the Woes
So there I was, foof in the air, knees up to my chest, with a complete stranger copping an eye-full of my nether regions, looming over me branding a spatula dripping with hot wax. I lay back and thought of England, gritting my teeth and bracing myself for the eye-watering pain of the Hollywood Lycon wax, wishing a final farewell to my ladygarden. She went for it. And I literally thought she had ripped my vagina clean off. As she got to work, trying to engage me in conversation (I CAN'T BLOODY TALK WHEN YOU'RE RIPPING MY VAG TO SHREDS WOMAN!) It was then, in that bleak and all-too familiar moment, that I finally wondered when womenkind got the to point of paying a complete stranger £40 to yank their pubes off.
When did we become so pube-phobic that we resorted to these extremes!?!?
Imagine this but worse ^^^
The following days comprised of wearing loose-fitting clothes, avoiding having hot showers (I like 'em scorching) and exfoliating that lil thang like there was no tomorrow in an attempt to ward off ingrowing hairs. BLEURGH. For approximately three weeks it was dreamily smooth and it got the thumbs up from the BF, but was the pain really worth the gain? I'm not so sure...
I hear you cry, "why don't you just shave!?" or "Whack some Veet on the ol'lass?"
But sista - don't even get me STARTED on shaving and hair removal creams. It's all fine and dandy on day one when you're fresh as a daisy and smooth as a baby's bum. But by day two (and god forbid day three) when that mofo starts making a comeback don't you just know it. These solutions may be infinitely cheaper and less painful, granted, but when you take into consideration shaving rash, stubble and itchy mid-stage grow back you're left feeling just as sorrowful. And then you get into a sort-of-shaving-everyday-frenzy until your hairs starts to become some sort of super-pubes that you could use as a jousting poles.
Of course, there is always the ol' trim. A little neat and tidy touch up now and then which inflicts no pain. But the upkeep is a bit of a faff and you often wander into TOO HAIRY territory and can accidentally give your vagina a bit of a severe buzz cut all too easily.
We ALL know why taking care of one's nether's is a neccessity. We want to be perfectly considerate to any lovely lads (or lasses) that decide to take a little crotch campout for our pleasure. Noone wants to venture down there to encounter a mouthful of fuzz and a 'fro that looks like it belongs back in the 80's. That's not "sexy". And I'm a firm believer that you should practise what you preach when it comes to haircare...
Is it just me that's left feeling like we are constantly choosing from the best of a bad bunch when it comes to hair removal? If our partners and boyfriends prefer a permanent "no 'fro" should they cough up the dough to put towards the maintenance? Is any of this even healthy for our lady parts?
As someone who's tried out all options for months at a time I can safely say I don't have the answers. But I'm interested to know your opinions about this. What do you think is the best solution? Is pain or price a factor for you? Do you prefer to go au naturel? Are women today pressured to whip it all off?
Let me know in the comments below!